Where are the before and after pictures of our emotional growth?

Have you ever surprised yourself by breathing a little heavier than you should after walking up a flight of stairs or felt shocked by how you look in a picture that one of your friends posted on your social (and thank you for the “memories” from 7 years ago).

In those moments we think…

I’ve got to do something about this. This is embarrassing.

So we join a group or program (or follow a youtube channel) and get asked to:

• Take before and after pictures so you can see your progress
• Take measurements of all the relevant places so you can know that change is happening even when you can’t see it
• Then if you’re really brave, post the picture so that people can encourage you and keep you accountable.

In my own journey, I have BEFORE pictures but not any AFTER pictures. I tend to get comfortable again with the status quo pretty quickly before I ever arrive at the place where I want to be. All I’m left with is a bunch of unused supplement packages and quite a few funny conversations with my kids trying to explain why a random picture of me is on my camera roll.

Imagine if we took this same approach to our emotional healing.

• Paying attention when feeling the emotional equivalent of being out of breath when doing something that should be effortless. Like getting out of bed in the morning. Choosing to be in tune with our hearts and minds in such a way that we become aware we are drifting.
• Considering where we are in key areas of our life (family, friendships, finances, faith, fitness, food, and future). Taking a moment to have an unfiltered look at our reality across the board to identify where we are drowning, surviving, striving, and the spaces where we are thriving.
• Being intentional by taking small steps forward each day so that our thoughts, feelings, and emotions are making our lives (and the lives of those we love) better, not worse. Not losing hope that we haven’t arrived yet, but being encouraged that we took the right step for today.
• Choosing to surround ourselves with people that are safe where our successes are celebrated and vulnerability is not only accepted, but expected. A person or two that will show up at a moment’s notice with a word of encouragement or will scrape us up off the pavement….whatever is needed.

It is easier to talk about making a change in our physical appearance with others than being vulnerable about our emotional growth. The feeling is real that we might be less judged by others when posting an embarrassing picture of our out-of-shape bodies than when writing a post about our feelings of hopelessness in a particular situation we are facing.

Not everyone deserves to know your story, but you deserve your story to be known by those who care for you deeply.

Consider these steps to start the process of having an emotional before and after transformation story.

1. Pull out paper and write down everything that comes to mind about how you “feel” about you and your present life”.
2. Now open a fresh page and write down all the hopes and dreams you would want if you had a magic wand to make it all happen.
3. Pick one thing you can do today that is the smallest step in that direction.
4. Tell a friend about your journey and invite them to encourage you in a way that works for you. Not a way that people tell you they should.

 

 

Photo by NordWood Themes